Love Effervescent

Two-headed boy

2011-01-06T10:44:00.003-06:00

You've single-handedly ruined all of my favorite artists. I'm plagued by your presence whenever I hear once familiar melodies, now sullied by your ways.

My past 24 hours in a song

2010-12-28T20:25:00.001-06:00

Your problem

2010-09-23T02:56:00.002-05:00

You want life to be this exciting thing where something new happens everyday. No matter what one does, one can never escape monotonous routine. It is inevitable. Please stop blaming me for your tediousness, when really it's your own goddamn fault.

#4 (Escape Velocity)

2010-04-04T13:41:00.000-05:00

Engulfed in the whitest down quilt
With the outline of your face from your
Prominent nose to your
Gap that is most likely copywritten.
I want to be here forever.
Dead, with concious rivers of you and your
Beauty.
This state is unfathomable.
There is no space, mass, or time.
But the intangible you somehow lingers in
My creases where there should be tears.

#13 (Doomed)

2010-02-23T01:10:00.001-06:00

The friction between my thighs as I
Catch up to your pace is always worth it.
Your long smooth strides
Make the jazziest quartet swell,
"He knows it."

Puffing like a steam engine
Comfortable 25 miles an hour
There were trumpets
and they roared.

I am the handcar barely going 5
I'll be lapped twice by.
I cower because I
don't want to make the most unthinkable request.
My sore arms flail
And there's a tempo in my chest.
I don't want to cramp.
Would you like to cramp someone?
Always giving them conditions
And inhaling all the fun?
Till the molecules are drenched
with the worst ennui?

His ears start ringing.
You know because you see it in his knees.
Do I say thank you?
Or will he think "fuck you!"
I never wanted to destruct such.

Instead I say nothing.
And he apologizes.

The steam engine cools.

His strides match my
Slow-trudging
Barely-budging
Pudging pudding legs.

It's all in the title?

2010-01-10T03:05:00.002-06:00

I just realized that although this blog is called Love Effervescent, not many of my posts are about love. Oh well.

I'm going to be trying a new subject matter approach, and recall my daily happenings. Brace yourselves for mediocrity!

Thursday there was a massive snowstorm. It must have snowed for at least 12 hours. Not sure how many inches we got, but this is Wisconsin, and it was a metric-shitton. Got the great idea of going downtown to the hookah bar.

I left my house at 9:30 with Lydia and Ryan already with me. I had to pick up Andrew, Justin, and Mike, but since there wasn't enough room in my car, I had to drop Andrew and Ryan off at Ryan's car in the Champps parking lot. It was about 10:30 by the time I picked up Justin.

Then we saw the funniest thing. In the spirit of the snow storm, someone pulled a DGAF and drove right over the roundabout on Drexel. Not through. Over. This thing is raised at least 9 inches off of the ground. We saw the tracks as proof.

After Tokyo drifting our way downtown and almost crashing into the median, we made it to 2 Sweet by 11:15. As soon as we got there, they announced they were closing at 11:30. Bust.

Instead we lounged in Oakland Gyros for a good hour and a half. You know when you put two groups of friends together and it's usually always awkward? Well, that was my night.

On the way back to my car, we had to walk in the street because the sidewalks weren't shoveled and was too aerobic for all of us (worse than walking in sand). A car of 5 people swerved at us on purpose, rolled down the windows, and screamed for us to walk on the sidewalk. I wonder what would have happened if they had actually hit us, because they were pretty damn close. Lawsuits? Hospital bills? New friends?

After Tokyo drifting about 9 times, my boat of a Mercury Sable made it home in one piece, with little to no casualties.

Top 150 Songs of the Decade (According to Me)

2009-12-31T14:08:00.001-06:00

I combed my iTunes library which has been broken at least 4 times in the past 8 years, and compiled this list of what I think to be the best songs of the decade.

To listen to my playlist of the top 50, go ::HERE::

(*Note*-I had to substitute "Get Like Me" - Childish Gambino, "One Thing Stands" - bark bark bark, "I Know What I Am" - Band of Skulls, and "Natasha in Highschool" - Richard McGraw until Grooveshark lets my mp3s go through.)

150. Get Low Feat Ying Yang Twins- Lil Jon and the Eastside Boyz
+Can you not picture a middle school/high school dance without this song? It makes you think of those horrible awkward times when you didn't know how to grind. And yes, you suck.
149. Calabria 2007 - Enur
+Almost sure this is the most sampled dance track of this decade. Literally thousands of remixes exist. Take a look for yourself.
148. That Rainy Day Song - Broderick (formally 806 Main St.)
147. Quiet on the Front - Company of Thieves
146. Serious - Richard Hawley
145. The Scientist - Coldplay
144. Kid On My Shoulders - White Rabbits
143. Bryn - Vampire Weekend
142. Oh What A World - Rufus Wainwright
141. Vanilla - Gackt
140. Romantic Rights - Death From Above 1979
139. Hikari - Utada Hikaru
138. Pop the Glock - Uffie
137. Bad Education - Tilly & The Wall
136. Milk Shake - Kelis
135. You're So Last Summer - Taking Back Sunday
134. Fat Lip - Sum 41
133. Don't Mug Yourself
132. You and I Both (Acoustic bootleg) - Jason Mraz
+The original from the album isn't good, but this acoustic version my cousins and I have been passing around for some time now is completely Earth-shattering and beautiful.
131. Here I Dreamt I Was an Architect - The Decemberists
130. On the Radio - Regina Spektor
129. Furr - Blitzen Trapper
128. Alive With the Glory of Love - Say Anything
127. Van Helsing Boombox - Man Man
126. C'Mon C'Mon - The Von Bondies
125. Island in the Sun- Weezer
124. Fidelity - Regina Spektor
123. Little Acorns - The White Stripes
122. Haligh, Haligh, a lie, Haligh - Bright Eyes
121. Are You the One? - The Presets
120. Flashing Lights (Ft. Dwele) - Kanye West
119. NY Excuse - Soulwax
118. Fell In Love With a Girl - The White Stripes
117. Clark Gable - The Postal Service
116. F**k the Pain Away - Peaches
115. Photobooth - Death Cab for Cutie
114. 99 Problems - Jay Z
113. For Real - Okkervil River
112. Knights of Cydonia - Muse
111. Sleeping Lessons - The Shins
110. Day 'n' Nite - Kid Cudi
109. Just Dance - Lady Gaga
108. Get Free - The Vines
107. Time to Pretend - MGMT
106. Don't You Evah - Spoon
105. The Engine Driver - The Decemberists
+This is the first song I ever heard by the Decemberists, and I instantly fell in love. As many of you now know, they are one of my favorite and I consider them one of the most influential bands of the decade as well.
104. Fett's Vette - MC Chris
103. L'Via L'Viaquez - The Mars Volta
+Probably one of my most listened to tracks of 2005, back in my prog-rock phase.
102. Things I Don't Remember - Ugly Casanova
101. Daydreamin' (Ft. Jill Scott) - Lupe Fiasco
100. Bad Romance - Lady Gaga
99. Loose Lips - Kimya Dawson
98. Music is My Hot, Hot Sex - CSS
97. King Rat - Modest Mouse
96. Wicked Game (Chris Isaak Cover) - Giant Drag
95. Heart Beats (The Knife Cover) - Jose Gonzales
94. A Different City - Modest Mouse
93. Drinkin' In The Woods - Jimmy Fallon
92. Bandages - Hot Hot Heat
91. Drunken Lullabies - Flogging Molly
90. Walk Idiot Walk - The Hives
89. Let It Ride - Ryan Adams & the Cardinals
88. Bird on a Wire - Rogue Wave
87. One More Time - Daft Punk
86. Caring is Creepy - The Shins
85 President of What - Death Cab for Cutie
84. Listen Up - The Gossip
83. Hands Down - Dashboard Confessional
82. Maps - Yeah Yeah Yeahs
81. I Am a Full Grown Man (I Will Lay in the Grass All Day) - Phosphorescent
80. Clint Eastwood - Gorillaz
79. Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger - Daft Punk
78. Big Bills (Ft. Caroline Polachek) - Flosstradamus
77. Atlantis to Interzone - Klaxons
76. Inertiatic ESP - The Mars Volta
75. September / the Joker - Fatboy Slim & Earth, Wind & Fire
74. Satellite - Guster
73. Willow Tree - Chad VanGaalen
72. The Next Episode - Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg
71. Lazy Eye - Silversun Pickups
70. Ready for the Floor - Hot Chip
69. Til the Sun Turns Black - Ray Lamontage
68. We Are Rockstars - Does It Offend You, Yeah?
67. Roses - Outkast
66. Right Hand Hi - Kid Sister
65. All These Things That I've Done - The Killers
64. Going Back to Lucy - Kentucky Nightmare
63. Sleepyhead - Passion Pit
62. Days Go By - Dirty Vegas
+See? You forgot about that horrible Jetta commercial and can come to terms that this is still an amazing piece of electronic music.
61. Multiply - Jamie Lidell
60. Purple Pills - D12
59. Black Mags - The Cool Kids
58. Imaginary Places - Busdriver
57. My Body is a Cage - The Arcade Fire
56. Where's Your Head At? - Basement Jaxx
55. Take Me Out - Franz Ferdinand
54. Curse be the Everything, Now! And All Who Sail With It - Everything, Now!
53. Snakes of a Plane - Cobra Starship
52. I'm Not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance With You - Black Kids
51. Trouble With Dreams - Eels

WOAH TOP 50

50. I Got Punched In the Nose for Sticking My Face In Other Peoples' Business - Boys Night Out
+This song was the entire reason why I bought the whole album. It was prevalent for the whole 6 months I was emo in 8th grade. Ahhhhh yeah.
49. Fancy Footwork - Chromeo
48. Neighborhood #2 (Laika) - The Arcade Fire
47. Natasha in Highschool - Richard McGraw
46. Get Like Me - Childish Gambino
45. Galvanize - The Chemical Brothers
44. Good Time's Gonna Come - Aqualung
43. I Know What I Am - Band of Skulls
42. I Was Here - Cabin
41. A Favor House Atlantic - Coheed and Cambria
40. At the Bottom of Everything - Bright Eyes
39. The Blower's Daughter - Damien Rice
38. Okay I Believe You, But My Tommy Gun Don't - Brand New
+Oh the memories of cruising and listening to Brand New.
37. My Girls - Animal Collective
36. Start Wearing Purple - Gogol Bordello
35. Hummingbird - Born Ruffians
34. The Fear - Lily Allen
33. One Thing Stands - bark bark bark
32. One Red Thread - Blind Pilot
31. The Beach - Dr. Dog
30. The Dress Looks Nice on You - Sufjan Stevens
29. Crimewave - Crystal Castles
28. Vi sitter i Ventrilo och spelar DotA - Basshunter
27. Pizza Day! - The Aquabats
26. Commerce, TX - Ben Kweller

TOP 25

25. Art Isn't Real (City of Sin) - Deer Tick
24. Knife - Grizzly Bear
23. Oscar Wilde - Company of Thieves
22. For the Widows in Paradise, For the Fatherless in Ypsilanti - Sufjan Stevens
21. Ocean Breathes Salty - Modest Mouse
20. White Winter Hymnal - Fleet Foxes
19. Cotton - The Mountain Goats
18. Hang Me Up to Dry - Cold War Kids
17. The Gymnast, High Above the Ground - The Decemberists
16. Oxford Comma - Vampire Weekend
15. My Sweet Carolina - Ryan Adams
14. Golden Star - My Brightest Diamond
13. You Are a Runner And I Am My Father's Son - Wolf Parade
12. I Bet You Look Good on the Dance Floor - Arctic Monkeys
11. Young Folks (Ft. Victoria Bergsman) - Peter, Bjorn & John
10. Andrew - Crystal Antlers
9. Piazza, New York Catcher - Belle & Sebastian
8. D.A.N.C.E. - Justice
7. The Old Shoes - Deer Tick
6. Flume - Bon Iver

TOP 5

5. Poor Jackie - Man Man
4. Wake Up - The Arcade Fire
3. The Mariner's Revenge Song - The Decemberists
2. New Slang - The Shins
1. John Wayne Gacy, Jr. - Sufjan Stevens

For some reason...

2009-12-04T18:45:00.002-06:00

...this is just the funniest thing I have ever written with my friend D Patron. Imagine it in a robot voice.

"I am a poor Italian man. My family makes pasta and we have Italian greyhounds. They do nothing. We are considering making pasta with them inside of it. Have you ever resorted to eating dog? I have. That's why you haven't seen your mother in ages."

Don't move an inch...don't move a single second.

2009-11-03T06:13:00.003-06:00

Whenever I feel unimportant or down on myself, I go through some old letters of mine. Particularly the one which reads:

"We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted as a First-year student to the College of Asia Pacific Studies of Ritsumeikan Asia Pacific University for enrollment in Fall Semester, 2008."

I remember when I got that letter. Immediately I tried to alert everyone I knew. Finally, I thought, I'm going to Japan! Where I belong! I'd make so many new friends and have so many interesting stories to tell. Fuck Oshkosh, I was going to my dream school! They even offered to pay for 30% of my tuition and other fees!

My parents let me have my joy for a few hours, I went to work and told my co-worker/best friend since 5th grade the news. She was sad because we were all set to room together at Oshkosh, and she would miss me, since she wasn't planning on saying good-bye when the summer ended, but happy that I got in.

I came home later that night and my mom sat down with me. "You're not going to APU." She never really explained why. She said it had something to do with finances, but to this day I don't believe her. She just had no idea what she would do if I was that far away, making a new life for myself. That's what I truly believe stopped her. It wasn't fair.

And here I sit, almost 20 years old, in my room in my parents' house, thinking I missed out on the opportunity of a lifetime. Things went in the complete opposite direction. Depression helped me make a failure of myself at UW-Oshkosh, and now I'm stuck going to a local technical college making $7.25 an hour at Blockbuster, with minimal plans for the future.

When I glance at the letter and documents to apply for a student visa and estimated living costs in Japan, I imagine an Andrea in an alternate universe who was actually allowed to go to APU. There's no such thing as destiny, but there are such things as reluctant moms and tuition fees and state colleges where Midwestern conformity is bred and bad grades. It's all just a matter if I'm a Grand Master in the end or not. I'm betting on the latter.

Ugly Casanova

2009-10-16T04:15:00.001-05:00

Even though this world is wireless, I am endlessly entangled in this web of technology. And I loathe it.

You see,

2009-09-11T05:55:00.000-05:00

it's the weighing of the the hearts. She who is worthy is surely not me, carrying a suitcase full of faults and shattered precious China. I shouldn't have handed out so many "sorry"s in my time. I chased too many, too often. Oh, how I recall the flames licking my heels in pure delight, never to singe the skin, just to excite. What actually happened in the equation was a horrible addition of a certain number high above the scale, and you tipped it. The result as impacting as unsent letters.

I was I was I was.

Rescinding certain things would be ideal, but not realistic in any sense, so I tread on. With the monsters glaring at me over my shoulder, following close behind, groping for my heels. And what to make of all this matter uncanny to the touch, all too familiar? It's all just bitter plastic.

I am I am I am.

I know now what I knew then, but I didn't know then what I know now

2009-09-04T03:39:00.002-05:00

"Nostalgia.
It’s delicate, but potent…
Teddy told me that in Greek, nostalgia literally means the pain from an old wound.
It’s a twinge in your heart, far more powerful than memory alone.
This device… isn’t a spaceship, it’s a time machine.
It goes backwards, forwards.
It takes us to a place where we ache to go again.
It’s not called the Wheel.
It’s called the Carousel.
It lets us travel the way a child travels.
Around and around and back home again, to a place where we know we are loved."

Make him say

2009-08-19T05:12:00.003-05:00

Favorite directors as of right now

1. Rian Johnson
2. Wes Anderson
3. Woody Allen
4. Sam Mendes
5. Jason Reitman
6. Quentin Tarantino
7. Kathryn Bigelow

Just one thing

2009-07-28T03:56:00.002-05:00

I've become the one thing I've always feared: The person who doesn't read the book before seeing the movie.

Bittersweet.

2009-07-20T02:55:00.003-05:00

Tonight was awesome for many reasons.

Played Mario Party 2 for a little bit. I was in the lead with 4 stars until Ryan and Chris got bored because I was actually winning for once. Whatever. They suck. Then we went to Johnny V's which is always a good-ass time. That place is starting to grow on me. Before we even entered the store, we had a dance session to "Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger" by Daft Punk. I haven't danced like that in so long.

Tonight sucked for many reasons.

I finished vol. 1 of Y: The Last Man. I never thought I'd actually enjoy a comic before. I have to wait until tomorrow to get vol. 2. Hopefully B&N will have it.
I got home and looked at my homepage with the headline on CNN news: "Frank McCourt, Author of 'Angela's Ashes,' dies" Considering his novel Angela's Ashes was simply the prelude to my reading of adult literature, this makes me very upset. I even read 'Tis and Teacher Man. It was even my dream to interview him someday, which I guess will never happen. Rest in peace, Frank McCourt.

What else can I say?

2009-07-13T02:21:00.003-05:00

I apologize for all of the super depressing posts lately. I've been reading The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath, and everything about it makes your body succumb to a terrible melancholy feeling. But I'm feeling better now.

Last night I recorded Jolly Farm Review with Mark and my friend Lydia. We had some pretty good conversations and debates about being a Jedi or a wizard/witch. I chose witch because magic people can do everything a Jedi does. Pretty much.

Then today Lydia and I fought off a bee nest to obtain her extra bike for a bike ride to Ferch's and Shannon's. Halfway through, my gears broke, so I was peddling many more revelations than Lydia on flat surfaces. Hah. But it was fun. My hot dog from Ferch's sucked though. Actually, everything did. And it was all 12 bucks. Not worth t.

After that other things happened. There was Mario Party 2 played. And even a little Goldeneye.

Next week I have to record the jfr episode without Mark's help. I hope I don't fuck it up TOO bad. No. I shouldn't.

Tomorrow will consist solely of me re-reading Half-Blood Prince all day. That's all it takes.

I feel bad that I don't feel bad.

2009-07-05T01:37:00.002-05:00

Have you ever wondered what would happen if you skipped town without a note and made a new living in a town you've never heard of far far away? Because I think that all the time. I don't think I'd be missed either. I don't really leave a great impression, if I happen to leave one at all.

The Best FML ever

2009-06-27T04:13:00.001-05:00

Today, I got my wisdom teeth out. My doctor said it was okay to eat, so, I had some mashed potatoes. Apparently, my body disagreed with the doctor, because I threw up. Because my face was so swollen, it didn't make it out my mouth. It went through my nose instead. I literally blew chunks. FML

I love vomit humor, so much. Literally laughed out loud when I read this.

youth in Asia

2009-06-24T02:42:00.004-05:00

I dreamed about him again last night. And I woke up feeling better than I have in weeks. It was such a good dream. For some reason my friend was driving a minivan, I was sitting shotgun, and he was sitting in the back seat with my entire family (minus my dad) and we were all content. It was a nice drive, we were going to some party somewhere. And my Minolta SRT 101 was functioning again and I took the most wonderful pictures. Everyone was laughing. Then I woke up immediately feeling brilliant.

I'm sorry for all of the depressing updates. It's just how everything has been. And don't ask me about it, either. I don't like to talk about it, and there's really nothing you can do.

Peaking over shoulders, waiting for my time to come

2009-06-23T03:22:00.004-05:00

It won't be a mystery. In fact, there should be very little confusion as to why, since it's so obvious. Perspective is one thing, but taking this stance of feigned ignorance has finally grown tiresome. Please don't worry. I'm sure we'll see one another again. As long as these words are not simply streaming through the pulses of your brain, but generated to life with your lips.

I'm not sure why I even speak some days.

If you feel that way

2009-06-19T04:03:00.003-05:00

It's been so long since I've cried before tonight.

It makes the past few months feel better.

It's about chasing tails and light. He's much too fascinating for me. And attractive. And near perfection. He's funny and probably doesn't like my cackle. That's what I fucking do. I don't laugh. I don't even chortle. I fucking cackle.

He tells great stories of "This one time" without actually saying "this one time." They don't compare to mine. What have I done but failed, failed, and failed some more.

This fucking guy.

.

2009-06-13T03:27:00.004-05:00

On.

The orange fluorescent streetlight in front of my house has issues. It can't decide whether it wants to be a beacon to passersby and bid them a fair walk home in the rain, or forsake those that seek out the path to familial places. One must ask: Where is home? A Buddhist temple, that shitty dilapidated house on the corner where the lonely old woman lives with her snippy dog and wheelchair ramp, the small shelter at the bus stop. What's completely random doesn't matter. It's life which consists of no symbolism, no metaphors of green lamps of envy, or omnipotent eyes on a billboard for an optometrist, or rose buds. No one specifically plants tiger lilies to represent their ache to be young again, or her infidelities.

Off.

My mind originates in another dimension that which cannot be accessed by asking me a question. My mind tells me that I must make sense of those two rain droplets adhered temporarily to my window. I must cry upon realizing that those two rain droplets narrate my entire life. Except the ending is slightly different.

On.

A person can write crazy shit when they're...well...crazy. I get consumed with nonsensical things. All. The. Time. But mostly, it's my faith in men. They are my best friends. They are my flaws. They are my figure eight train tracks. They are my straightened hair. They are that fucking cover-up I bought to conceal my blotchy skin for $6.99.

Off.

But they are also nothing. Just beings existing in the same world as me. Randomly manuvering around this sphere as I am. Some find truths. Most just adapt others' perceptions and dreams. Too much room for rolemodels. Infinitely more room for improvement.

On.

Eighth notes and quarter notes and sixteenth notes in 4/4 time are manipulated into masterpieces. Coda. Forte. Adagissimo.

Off.

My backpack's got jets

2009-06-07T11:53:00.002-05:00

These last two weeks have been incredible, to say the least. I saw Company of Thieves do a show in Kenosha, and the set was amazing, especially their newest song. The best part was being invited up onstage with my friend to sing with Genevieve, the lead singer. So amazing! And then we met each member of the band afterwards and got a hug from each of them. Ahhhhh, but my week gets better.

I got a call from Blockbuster for an interview, which I nailed, and now I have another one tomorrow! I think that would be a decent job, considering my undying affection for movies and spreading the Good Word (of movies, not Jaysus).

Saw the Decemberists in concert at the Riverside Theater. I got to dance and sing onstage with them, which was one of my life goals. Then...my friends and I met Colin Meloy the lead singer and got a picture with him and I got his autograph on my shirt I bought for the tour! That was another one of my life goals. Seriously. I put it on my 43 Things list.

Aaaand! Finally! Jolly Farm Review is up and fully functional! Our first episode was posted last week! Take a listen, if you will. And tonight episode 2 premieres at 4 PM CST. Soon we'll have it available in mp3 so you can download it and for free on iTunes.

Oh, and read my blog on there now, it's being updated more often.

Oh?

2009-05-11T12:19:00.001-05:00

I just had a dream about someone I met once 2 years ago, and I haven't seen since. Is that weird? Does that happen to people?

Good stories to tell at parties

2009-05-11T00:52:00.002-05:00

I was going through my old myspace messages (I haven't been on myspace in ages) and I found a message about a story from my sophomore year of high school. Here's my summary roundup to my friend on AIM.

jan ken PWNDD (12:40:35 AM): I was such a cheater in high school. We had to write these papers on the atomic bomb in Honors US, and a few days after we handed them in, my teacher was like, "Okay everyone. There are some suspected cases of plagiarism in this class, so I want everyone to write out an explanation to me about why you cheated."

jan ken PWNDD (12:40:48 AM): So, I wrote this long explanation about what specific parts I stole from other people. After we handed them in, he was reading through our explanations and he told us all that it was a joke

jan ken PWNDD (12:40:58 AM): But I actually did steal my paper from other people

jan ken PWNDD (12:41:57 AM): And he asked me, "Waters, this is pretty good. Did you actually cheat?" and I just lied and told him I heard from the other class that he was going to pull this prank on us

jan ken PWNDD (12:42:54 AM): I feel so horrible now

This week's playlist

2009-05-06T00:16:00.002-05:00

This is my playlist this week of recommended music:

1. "Trust me" by The Streets
2. "Day n Nite" by Kid Cudi
3. "Flagpole Sitta" by Harvey Danger
4. "Love the World (Indigo Star Cruiser Remix)" by the Karoshi Brothers
5. "Gay Fish" by Kanye West
6. "88" by The Cool Kids
7. "Big Bills" by Flosstradamus ft. Caroline Polachek
8. "18 and Life" by Skid Row
9. "Movin' Out (Anthony's Song)" by Billy Joel
10. "Ashamed" by Deer Tick

"There's no school like the old school, and I'm the fucking headmaster"

2009-05-04T22:11:00.003-05:00

So, this weekend was probably the best weekends I've ever had.

It was spent in a 1.5 million dollar condo in Chicago with one of my closest friends, I made a lot of new friends, saw Wolverine, slept with a genuine cashmere blanket, frolicked on a pitch black out of use Amtrak train at 4 AM whilst finding a dufflebag, ate enough Mexican food for a lifetime, met longboarders in leg park, played with cameras and glowsticks, went on a 2 hour adventure looking for said glowsticks, met up with an old friend on a bridge with a hoola hoop, and was finally truly happy for the first time in months. The time of my life.

HAPPY 50TH POST!!!!!

2009-04-22T09:07:00.003-05:00

Hello everyone, let me just say, this is my 50th post!!

It's actually not that monumental.

It's 9AM and I still haven't gone to sleep yet. I'm starting to get incredibly drowsy, but I must persevere. I musn't fall asleep because that will screw up my sleeping schedule even more. Fuck.

Maybe lemon bread will help me stay awake?

I doubt it. Damn. And I don't have any caffeine either. Shhhhhiiiiit.

What would the world be like if...

2009-03-27T00:20:00.003-05:00

Stephanie Meyer never published Twilight:

The world would be a complete utopian society. We would all live in complete peace and find our own self-fufillment without ever having a hard day's work, unless you wanted to.

Paradise

You would never see a crying baby. All babies would have expressions like this permanently:

Clearly a baby who has never read Twilight

The world would be united as one, with no war or conflict whatsoever:

Pangea would probably still exsist today

There would be no allergies or disease

If only all people could enjoy life as much as these three

There would be zero crime, and people wouldn't even dabble with bothersome locks:

They're ready to love one another, not sue or vandalize eachothers possessions

Oh, what a world we would live in:

Hullo

2009-03-26T21:53:00.001-05:00

Hayy guys

I've been updating my blog at Jolly Farm. Check it out:

http://www.jollyfarmreview.com/andrea
http://www.jollyfarmreview.com/andrea
http://www.jollyfarmreview.com/andrea
http://www.jollyfarmreview.com/andrea
http://www.jollyfarmreview.com/andrea
http://www.jollyfarmreview.com/andrea

New Project: Jolly Farm Review

2009-03-20T02:23:00.006-05:00

Do you like movies? Do you like laughter and or humor? Then follow me to the Jolly Farm Review!

Jolly Farm Review is a podcast my friend Mark and I are starting in May. You can follow our updates leading up to the official launch at http://www.jollyfarmreview.com

Side effects include:

Kittens

Sunshine

Jelly beans.

Clouds shaped like cool shit

Goats dancing to accordions

58 Days Until the first podcast.

Dumbdog Millionfag

2009-03-18T14:42:00.003-05:00

So, we all know how I feel about Slumdog Millionaire. It definitely didn't deserve to win best picture, let alone be nominated. I always had a strong defense about why the film wasn't complete failure: A.R. Rahman. "Jai Ho" in particular. However, this has been ruined for me today too. All thanks to the Pussycat Dolls.

It won't let me embed the video, but here's the link for this catastrophe:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VrVlBrooxcM

God is dead because the Pussycat Dolls aren't.

Of Adsense, Applesauce, History, and the Universe

2009-03-18T01:33:00.004-05:00

Has anyone else found the show The Universe on the History Channel as addicting as I have? I took an Earth/Space science class in high school. For some reason I didn't appreciate it then, but I do now. If I were better at math, I probably would have gone into astrophysics. Too bad I suck at everything.

Just a few notes:

Adsense sucks.

<---- Look! my twitter feed Applesauce is fucking awesome I'm sorry for this shitty update. Happy St. Patrick's Day, even though it was technically yesterday. Goodnight. The best song ever "El perron" by Cilantro Enter away message

El perro, el perro, es mi corazón
El gato, el gato, el gato no es bueno
Cilantro es cantante
Cilantro es muy famoso
Cilantro es el hombre con el queso del diablo

El perro, el perro, nunca sin razón
El gato, el gato, es obsceno
Cilantro es caliente
Cilantro es cariñoso
Mejor que su esposo

Pee Ess: I'm going to Washington DC next week. I'll post some pictures of our lovely capital. Maybe.

Yeah, No...I Know.

2009-02-25T01:04:00.003-06:00

Starting tomorrow, I've decided to spend less time online. I'm limiting it to at the most 1 hour a day for unbridled free surfing, and little to no facebook. I don't like seeing that my most visited page isn't even my homepage (Google) but is my facebook home. Honestly, how pathetic is that? Ridiculous. Just ridiculous. So, I can't go on facebook for two consecutive days, that's the new rule. Don't worry, I've already gotten rid of facebook mobile. This pasocon is now strictly a edgejumakashun machine.

Also, I need to severely cut down the time I spend watching TV. Nip/Tuck, Lie to Me, and the Office are the only ones that will get lovin' from me. That's 2 1/2 hours of television a week, if ya'll were wondering.

Are we human or are we dancer?

I'm a human in a generation of dancers.

Things I learned in the past 24-hours

2009-02-21T00:21:00.002-06:00

1. Aqua (the club) has closed and has been renovated into a new club. I forgot the name, but I need to go there.
2. Chunky mango hookah isn't tasty at all.
3. The good ole times are the best times
4. Astronomers used clues in the text of the Odyssey to figure out the date of its archery contest: April 16, 1178 B.C. NOT the Iliad! And I actually got that final Jeopardy right, but no one else did. HAH!
5. Best friend codes that society and girl magazines tell us to follow are absolute crap and only ignorant people follow them.
6. The Graduate, possibly one of the best movies ever, is on TCM RIGHT. NOW.
7. Next weekend will be the best weekend in awhile and is much needed.
8. Grandma still cooks the best potato pancakes
9. It's hard out here for a pimp
10. I don't know what M.I.A. named her new son, but she should name him Giraffe Sparkleson Superfly.

The Infamous bagger

2009-02-16T21:35:00.003-06:00

I often hear guys talking about baggers (definition 1). I'm sure this is a horribly shallow subject, but let's be honest: these people actually exist. Insanely attractive body, but seriously lacking in the face. This isn't going so far as a Christian Troy thing, who actually carries through with putting a bag over a patient he just did cosmetic surgery on, but here's my list of male celebrity baggers.

1. Mmmm, who's that?

Why, it's Michael Phelps! When he does interviews, I just quietly put the TV on mute if he has his shirt off. But if he's covered, you can forget it.

2. Indecent Exposure?

Channing Tatum from Step Up and Step Up 2 the Streets. He's not so much a bagger as he is a duct taper. If we were dating, I would never want to hear him speak. Ever. Just listen to this interview

3. (just ignore the nasty jeans)

Vin Diesel. Need I any more explanation?

4. Surfers are usually hot

...unless he's Matthew McConaughey He's a perfect example. I've yet to see him play a role that he hasn't already played. Except maybe that episode of Unsolved Mysteries...

5. And last but definitely not least...

Brendan Fraser. Dear God, If ever there was a more absolute bagger, it would be him.

Runner ups: Eminem, Dwayne "The Rock Johnson

gomen nasai, lo siento, à bientôt, Peço desculpa, I'm sorry

2009-02-13T03:28:00.002-06:00

I'm sorry I've been terribly absent lately. School is taking up most of my life for once, and I'm going to be "unplugged" or whatever you crazy technologic people call it this weekend. I promise an update next Monday AT THE LATEST.

"Are we just fancy robots?"

2009-02-03T03:14:00.004-06:00

Then we're pretty shitty robots.

I'm going to attempt a free-write with no paragraphs.

No I'm not, I'm tired.

[EDIT- 3:32AM]

I found this from my old LJ, and I'm honestly in the same predicament. Why is my life in circles?

"Ohhhhh so many things on my mind but so little time to explain. It's three
in the morning and I have sunk into my imagination with my friend Potential. I
ask myself questions and try to answer them and I'll see if they're correct.
Potential just keeps on encouraging me on to think of more things. Assumptions
mostly, but optimistic assumptions that belong to a dreamer. I can't wait I
can't wait I can't wait. Potential even told me that it's all going to happen
soon. Within the next month, even. Oh, my old friend Potential is such a dear
one to me. Last time she was wrong but this time she has to be right. "
(original post June 27th, 2005)

However, this time I'm about 97% sure she's wrong. That was written in my freshman year. I was wrong about Potential then too. I used to be irrational, but with age came rationality. That subject I am intrigued with truly doesn't care, and simply doesn't know, nor will he ever. It really is a shame that I don't have one of those infectious personalities where I can just start talking to someone and make an impression immediately. I'm not like that. I think too much before I say something, it's very methodical. Meekness gets the best of me. I wish I wasn't so damn shy.

My annual "shit to do this summer" list

2009-01-29T20:59:00.002-06:00

1. Get packets upon packets of solid carbon dioxide (dry ice), get a fog machine, dress in clothes from the 18th century, and go to Borders in which we knock over a gigantic book case and make a scene screaming "WHAT YEAR IS IT?!!" It will be a great theatrical arts piece to add to my portfolio.
2. Plant the semen of a hanged man (mandrakes...)
3. Have a velociraptor evacuation drill
4. Host a huge Nintendo game tournament with multiple TVs and such (Mario Kart, Mario Party, Super Smash Bros. Brawl, etc.)
5. Think of kitten names (ie Mrs. Bennet, Dedalus, Sassy Boots)
6. Spread zombie awareness with Ryan
7. Get decent at Gears of War 2
8. Finish my fricken Audrey Hepburn collage
9. Regularly attend el roller disco (excluding Fridays and Saturdays aka Nights when I will most likely get to meet people who will be charged with assault and battery)
10. Pick up some basic Portuguese como vai? todo bem?
11. Make giant gummy bears
12. Go to the Milwaukee Central Library a lot just to admire the architectural greatness. Oh, and research.
13. Celebrate Black History Season
14. Go protesting. What I'll be protesting? I don't know yet.
15. Spend more time out of state, besides Chicago. Maybe a roadtrip somewhere if we're wealthy enough

DID: It's no joke

2009-01-14T01:10:00.005-06:00

A few days ago, I saw an advertisement to watch the first episode of the unaired Showtime show, The United States of Tara. I took note that it was produced by Steven Spielberg and our favorite stripper-turned-WGA-writer, Diablo Cody. Not being aware of what the premise of the show was, I watched all 30 minutes.

The show profiles a middle-aged woman, Tara (Toni Collette, Little Miss Sunshine, Towelhead), who has 3 additional personalities to add to her own. She has a husband, and two kids--a rebellious teen daughter and an effeminate son. The characters of her family are actually very interesting, and I would be willing to watch the rest of the series to find out what happens to them. However, I do have a problem with this comedic scope on Dissociative Identity Disorder.

DID is a serious disorder when a person has, essentially, multiple personalities. It's highly controversial and some experts argue that it's not even a disorder. However, people that suffer from DID find it to be a living hell. Different personalities can be triggered by virtually anything, a sound, a certain person, or an intense amount of stress. Parts of a person's life with DID are blank, or missing from their memory. It's like having a war within yourself, except it can last a lifetime, and there's no prescribed way to win.

I'm not saying I'm particularly offended by The United States of Tara, it's just that the viewers are more than likely uneducated about what the disorder actually is. I mean, would people watch a comedy about the "humors" of having cancer? I love controversy, but for some reason, this seemed to rub me the wrong way. I was once reprimanded by a psychologist for cracking a joke about a person with alleged Histrionic Personality Disorder, and it put things in perspective for me about laughing at serious mental disorders.

You take the good, you take the bad, you take them both, and then you have...

2008-12-30T04:47:00.002-06:00

I've been watching old episodes of the Facts of Life for the past week for some reason. I used to watch the re-runs on Nick @ Nite when I was younger and this just brings back too many memories, even if this show wasn't originally from my generation.

On a good note, I've started writing again. I'm hoping it will be one of my full length novels. I don't think I've actually written one of those in at least 4 years. Refreshing.

Going mobile

2008-12-24T04:14:00.002-06:00

Wow, my first mobile blog. How can i fit what i want to say in an sms? This is incredibly stupid. Don't expect many more of these.

Hang me up to dry

2008-12-14T18:10:00.003-06:00

He asked me, "Where does your heart belong?"
I answered, "That's a difficult answer, seeing as I don't have one."

Even though it did happen, it didn't bring us closer at all. Quite the opposite, it drove us apart. And that really doesn't bother me for some reason. I've had this planned for awhile. I was talking to my friend L, and she didn't understand my method. Use one guy to get to the other. Does that make me a bad person?

The Mountain Goats

2008-11-07T03:09:00.005-06:00

I'm very grateful for this last and final season of Moral Orel. I just saw the episode "Passing" which was another flashback episode barely including Orel. There was little to no humor, but it honestly got to me. Any episode that ends in a song by The Mountain Goats often leaves the viewer feeling...sober.

It's similar to listening to the Seven Swans album by Sufjan Stevens. There's no other way to describe it but feeling unadulterated and true. While experiencing this, I usually have a chance to reflect on what everything means. Daily routines, relationships, overlooked details, habits. No matter how trivial, something always comes to mind.

Wow, I never thought I'd get this from Adult Swim.

I can feel the wrath of winter coming already. It's supposed to snow today, and I'm fearful. My winter jacket hasn't come in yet, and I just know this weekend is going to be miserable and lonesome. I'm reading Choke by Chuck Palahniuk and I'm still on Slaughterhouse 5. There isn't enough time for me to even finish Slaughterhouse 5. I've had it for probably about a week and a half. It's pathetic. But that's what this weekend is for.

"The point of ["Love, Love, Love"] is we are very well damaged by the legacy of the romantic poet, that we think of love as a thing that is with strings and is this force for good and then if something bad happens that's not love...I don't know so much about that I don't know that the Greeks weren't right, I think that they were, that love can beat a path through everything, that it will destroy a lot of things on the way to its objective which is just its expression of itself. You know my stepfather mistreated us terribly quite often, but he loved us and well, that to me is something worth commenting on in the hopes of undoing a lot of what I perceive is terrible damage, yet we talk about love as this benign comfortable force: it is wild."

-John Darnielle

That's all I want. I just want love.

Pheromones can't save me.

2008-11-05T03:31:00.002-06:00

It's 3:38AM. I'm eating ketchup packets and reading about when I had a sense of humor and a Free Mind.

'I liked..finding cute boys named Ryan Larson only to find out his interests are "sports, trucks, animals, building things, and the outdoors" and literally walking in a Winter Wonderland.'

There was a phase of e.e. cummings in my life, and his words are written all over. I forgot how beautiful that was.

"since feeling is first..."

I never fit in. "I'm not one of them. I'll never be the Hollister/Abercrombie clad bitch with the blond hair and fake tan. I'll never have that obnoxious, yet hollow like a jack-o-lantern laugh that makes bones rattle, but gives her that "cute" persona."

"We don't want to go out there, because the horizon is like the edge of the world. We're scared of what's next."

"All he said was, 'Andrea, I love you.' And I responded (because I'm such a conceited bitch) 'I know you do.'"

"I wonder that if I could run away fast enough, all of my memories would never catch up with me?"

Apparently I wrote in 3rd person sometimes "Uncertainty is Andrea's number 1 killer."

Hmm...

2008-11-02T02:14:00.001-06:00

Kanye West needs to stop singing.

For my Consideration: Things I regret

2008-11-02T01:07:00.005-05:00

I'm not "feeling it" tonight, so this post will lack substance. Here's a list.

Things I regret doing/not doing in my life:

1.Getting my tattoo. Okay, it's nothing bad, actually. It's just on my right foot and it says "God's Grace" in kanji. It will look incredibly stupid when I wear heels when I enter the work force, or any formal shoe for that matter. Great. Plus it says "God's Grace." I think I'm going to start telling people it means something else. Serenity or something cliche like that.
2. Canceling my application to Madison. I actually had a good chance of getting in, but for some reason, I wanted to go to fucking Oshkosh. We already know how I feel about this. Next.
3. Not taking piano lessons. My mom wanted me to take piano lessons so badly, but she never forced me to do anything, so I actually wished my mom pushed me more on this. I was young, probably about 3rd grade, but all of my friends hated their piano lessons, so I refused. I didn't know it at the time, but I was considered gifted and talented in music. I shouldn't have followed others, either. Wasted potential.
4. Watching Young Person's Guide to History on Adult Swim. This needs no explanation.
5. Having a certain "type" for guys. There really isn't much to my type, really. He's always a gamer with a few close friends. We always disagree on music and I have a sort of inferiority complex because he's always smarter than I am. He's very sarcastic and has a big ego but we can always have lengthy conversations about movies. For some reason, though, he doesn't like to talk about books. Which reminds me, no one reads anymore and it upsets me greatly. Finding a guy that has read Thus Spoke Zarathustra and isn't one of my professors is something I'm afraid I will never find. And he also has various incredibly dorky qualities about him, but he knows how to hold a conversation. It's an endless obsession that almost makes me feel that I'm missing out on a better kind. Pretentious assholes plague my life. Gahhh

Everyone's lying when they say they have no regrets. What do you regret?

THIS. IS. RADIO CLASH.

2008-10-31T14:46:00.002-05:00

It's that time of year again. Girls get the excuse to dress extremely skanky and get hella wasted. Guys get to compete to have the funniest costumes. It's really a shame that girls can't have funny costumes, because I totally would. I'm going ast Mickey Mouse, complete with ears. I don't like to put a lot of effort into my costumes, haha.

Tonight, I'm going to the city that is legendary for their Halloween celebration: Madison. Hopefully I'll have a good time, I don't see why I wouldnt.

Happy All Hallows' Eve, everyone! Go ghost hunting while you can.

The water is warm, but it sends me shivers

2008-10-28T15:35:00.004-05:00

Constantly, no matter where I turn, everyone claims that faith defines you. My Roommate is a self-proclaimed Christian, non-denominational, and talks of it often. She doesn't go to Church frequently, but she has little statues of her Jesus-loving self everywhere.

The other day we went to a seminar and the speaker asked, "How many of you believe in God?" My two friends both raised their hands, and I didn't. You could tell they felt uneasy, and were surprised at my reaction. The truth is, don't know what to call what I believe in. I'm constantly looking different schools of thought, philosophical ways of thinking, religions from all around the world. I'm in a time of my life where I'm researching, deciding. I'm aware of what I believe in for my morals, standards, and values, but I'm unsure of what to call it.

A Christian to me is: A person willing to "save" you, as if you're in dire need of help. They usually have an elitist attitude about themselves because they're Christian, they've found "the way" and you haven't, sucks you to be you, right? They're supposed to love their neighbors, except if they're Jewish, gay, Muslim, New-Age, atheist, agnostic, or anything else where Jesus is not involved. It makes no sense to me. Oh, and FYI, the world is ending soon they say. The end of days is apparently upon us.

I grew up in a very Lutheran family. I went to church every Sunday, had my first communion, got confirmed in 8th grade, and still continued to go when I was in high school. Women were allowed to preach, you'd still go to heaven even if you weren't baptized, and your sins were between you and God. The reason why I left is because the elderly people really got on my nerves, and there was way too much gossip in the community. Also, things that were happening in my personal life at the time were conflicting with the belief system of the Lutheran church.

This certain background of my life, however, was actually a benefit to me. My interest in literature shares a lot of parallel story lines and allusions to the Bible. Also, in European history, a background in Christianity helps you understand a lot of the conflicts, albeit religion was mostly used as a feeble excuse to do things. Classical paintings often tell stories of Biblical happenings that have more meaning if you recognize the context.

So, in this aspect, Christianity helped me. But over time is has been morphed, branched out, whittled down, and edited so many times that now it's something I don't respect. Religion is more or less a method to point a finger at others.

It's been wayy too long

2008-10-24T05:08:00.004-05:00

Things I miss:
1. Ramune
2. Yakisoba
3. Okonomiyaki
4. Tamago sushi!
5. The hustle and bustle of city life
6. Being able to walk at midnight without getting raped
7. Riding bicycles everywhere
8. Transportation that was available past 6
9. Trains/densha
10. pseudo-American imitation food
12. tonkatsu
13. People giving me funny looks
14. Toilets with other functions besides flushing (seat warmer, bidet hahaha)
15. Traditional Japanese toilets (You feel a certain type of accomplishment after using one without getting urine on yourself)
16. Talking about people when they're right there and them not being able to understand you
17. Using the gaijin card.
18. Late-night Japanese drama
19. Amazing movie theatres
20. Hamburger sushi (sounds gross, was amazing)
21. Free tissue
22. Random people in medical masks
23. Unappealing bookstores
24. Convenience stores that were hot hang out spots
25. My keitai
26 My host family
27. Nana
28. Vending machines everywhere
29. Bowing
30. Actually being able to use Japanese
31. Tokyo
32. Kyoto

33. Japan!

Things are getting better

2008-10-21T02:45:00.005-05:00

I stayed at Oshkosh this weekend and I actually enjoyed myself. Roommate and I saw Sex Drive and then we missed the bus back so we walked. It's a long walk, but it was hella fun. Found a delightful park on the way back and we had some good conversations and laughs like old times.

Then I bought my Halloween costume. I'm going to be Mickey Mouse. I'm going to Madison for Halloween, hopefully it's as banging and everyone says it is.

I've been thinking about classes for next semester, and I'm definitely taking a poli-sci class. Maybe a math class, if I must. And as for a language. I was thinking about taking French. Justice and other wonderful things hail from there, you know. Wonderful things.

German really wasn't working out for me. It was just kind of like...ugh. It felt like a chore. Japanese never felt like a chore, nor did Spanish. Plus it was quite difficult.

Who knows where I'll end up. I think I might do great things for this world.

I want to be one of those people you remember. Like the man who traveled around Europe for years and just picked up languages as he went around, did odd jobs, but was respectable and non-hobo like. And then he opened up a huge business, won some Oscars, wrote some books, started some non-profit orgs, and then eventually became a professor and now travels all around the world.

That's who I want to be.

Fuck it, I'm just going to go out there and do what I want. Meet people, network, learn, write. It's one thing to be taught something, but it's another to actually experience it. Melvil Dewey. Just like in To Kill a Mockingbird.

My parents should have praised me more as a child. Maybe I wouldn't be so meek.

I'm absolutely infatuated by the autumn air. I'd call it crisp, but that's just so overdone. It's more like cider air. It makes me crave the early sunsets and the temperature which permits us to stay out, but still require a coat to maintain homeostasis. (but the nose and cheeks do get chilly indeed) People use their bikes more frequently and attempt to fit in more time this wonderful tool of transportation before the roar of winter's cruelty prevents it.

One thing winter will bring is the inability for drunk students to walk around outside screaming at 2 AM. That's about the only pro I see in this situation.

As for boys, forget it. I don't have time for this. I don't want to rely on something/one for happiness. Make it or break it days. Phone calls, text messages, monotonous and boring codswallop. It's all so typical, and using sexuality as a tool is too common, and leads so little to the imagination. Let's better ourselves and not have this certain mindset.

As for the band: I don't know what happened to the band. No one talks to me anymore.

Hm.

D-V-N-O four capital letters

2008-10-13T22:14:00.002-05:00

I've lost more friends than I've made in this "new chapter" of life.

Montage

2008-10-10T03:29:00.004-05:00

"A montage sequence is a technique in Film editing in which a series of short shots is edited into a sequence to condense narrative. It is usually used to advance the story as a whole (often to suggest the passage of time)."

Honestly, I certain parts of my life could just be a montage. For example, college. I've only been here a little over a month, and already I'm sick of it. I hate it here. But honestly, I think it's just the campus, and the people I'm surrounded by.

No one here has any inspiration. It's as if students here aren't actually students, they're just here because they have a certain obligation for their parents. These are your nurses, business students, elementary art teachers, etc. This makes up a majority of the population. No one is thirsting for knowledge, wanting to learn as much as possible, going out of their way to see guest speakers (unless it's Adam Brody to tell you who to vote for) who actually want to lecture about things that matter. I wish we actually had guest speakers here, but we don't. It's exactly like high school with more drinking, more sex, and even more exclusive cliques.

In all frankness, I don't have anything against the people (girls) that go for nursing. My best friend and roommate is in the pre-nursing program. However, she knew what she was getting herself into. These girls here mostly just think nursing is a breeze, but little did they know that only 80 spots are actually open for the college of nursing, and about 200 girls are fighting for those spots. And you need a pretty hefty GPA, good recommendations and such to get in. But those people that don't take it seriously are in for a nightmare.

But, they still continue to go to school here. "My mom said I should go into accounting," is what a fellow student told me he was going to do. That's good direction. Yeah. Do what your mom thinks is best for you. I asked him if he thinks he should go into accounting. He said, "I really don't know. I just heard that business is easy." Bravo.

I was once a pre-business student for international business. MISTAKE. I don't want to take classes on management and other crap. Business can be a very difficult trade if you actually aspire to be somewhere in 10 years, but most of these people will end up doing almost nothing.

There's absolutely no direction for these small-minded people. I've met a total of one person who actually knows that there's something better out there. Her parents are living in Nepal for a year. We actually met at a floor meeting at the beginning of the semester, and she said this as her one interesting thing about herself for one of those goddamn ice-breaker activities. All the other girls were confused. They had no idea where Nepal is. She explained to them. I died inside.

Is it bad that I feel like an outcast at a college because I want to learn things?

God help me.

tomorrow I'll miss ya

2008-10-05T23:33:00.003-05:00

I'm too meek and unsure what to write about. I'm listening to the soundtrack for Across the Universe, and there's no other way to describe it.

I had such an amazing weekend.

Next week should be equally sublime.

For you: A gift

2008-10-01T01:45:00.002-05:00

An interesting website: Death by caffeine.

Ever wonder how much of your favorite drinks it would take to kill you? Find out by clicking that link!

Best Thing Since The Skittles Moving beard with skills!

2008-09-29T00:11:00.002-05:00

I just saw this commercial and thought it was hilarious. For one, it caught me off guard. I don't remember exactly what I was watching, but it enabled me to have the best reaction ever. I think I might have peed my pants. Thank God for Depends.

shock me

2008-09-22T01:36:00.002-05:00

All along the western front,
People line up to receive
She got the power in her hand,
to shock you like you won't believe
Saw her in the Amazon,
with the voltage running through her skin
Standing there with nothing on,
she's gonna teach me how to swim

Said ooh girl
Shock me like an electric eel
baby girl
Turn me on with your electric feel
I said ooh girl
Shock me like an electric eel
baby girl
Turn me on with your electric feel

All along the eastern shore,
put your circuits in the sea
This is what the world is for,
making electricity
You can feel it in your mind
Oh you can do it all the time
Plug it in and change the world
You are my electric ~~girl~~ boy

said ooh girl
shock me like an electric eel
baby girl
turn me on with your electric feel
said ooh girl
shock me like an electric eel
baby girl
turn me on with your electric feel

do what you feel now
electric feel now

elipses

2008-09-22T01:30:00.001-05:00

12,o00 people and I've never felt so alone.

Let's Debrief!

2008-09-20T02:42:00.003-05:00

I feel like making a list of things I'm obsessed with at the moment. Why?!? Because I'm staying up so I don't have a hangover tomorrow morning! Baaah!!!

1. ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT- Best comedy on TV ever, or best comedy on TV ever? It trumps the Office, by far. I love the Office, but seriously, AD makes the Office look like shit.
2. "D.A.N.C.E." by Justice- I can't stop listening to this song. It's so infectious and my obsession has lasted well over a month (record!)
3. InfoMania- This show is my weekly dose of humor on the media. I enjoy it more than the Daily Show and Colbert, I suppose. It has more variety and covers more news, whereas Stewart and Colbert are mostly political.
4. Blitzen Trapper- "Furr." Enough said. (Listen to it on my sidebar if you dare)
5. The Decemberists- I'd have to say they're one of my favorite bands of all time.
6. Taking and passing the 1-kyuu. (Hah, dream on)
7. Perez Hilton- I don't care what you think.
8. Ayn Rand. "Are you happy, Mr. Superman?"

For My Consideration: Lifemap

2008-09-17T00:40:00.002-05:00

It'll be okay. I just have too much ambition right now. For once I'm happy about what I'm doing and I don't feel lost. I know it will all turn out.

No one told me...

2008-09-16T03:02:00.001-05:00

"My man's got a heart like a rock that's in the sea."

WTF of the Week: Shane's graduation speech

2008-09-16T02:40:00.002-05:00

Whaaaaaat? Any thoughts?

"Lordy Don't leave me, all by myself."

2008-09-15T00:34:00.003-05:00

There's this thing that I do constantly. I make someone out in my mind more than they actually are to me.

I had a great weekend, but I'm still missing certain people.

Moby makes me cry. Or, at least these two songs do. The way I heard "Extreme Ways" and "In This World" for the first time was honestly like a soundtrack to what was happening at the time. It was painfully beautiful, and now those songs only remind me of that night. It was raining. It was bizarre. It was surreal. Now I sound like an emo douche. Thanks.

Failed Google searches.

2008-09-11T00:47:00.005-05:00

So I got bored today, and started Googling my friends for lack of a better thing to do. This is what I discovered:

"Let it all go, let 'em all go"

2008-09-09T01:32:00.004-05:00

I would rather not like to talk about college life. I miss home a whole hell of a lot. I feel out of the loop with everything. I have no updates.

But I return home on Friday, finally.

There are certain people I want to see more than others. Not to prioritize or anything. Well, hell, that is prioritizing people. I guess I'll just never stop doing that, right?

I can't stop listening to "Cotton" by the Mountain Goats. It's been on repeat for about a half hour now. Lovely song to contemplate to, really. There's a lot of time to contemplate here, since I don't really do anything. After homework's done, all I do is facebook and watch TV. It's pathetic, really. No one has opened up to me here on campus that I didn't already know beforehand. I'm terrible at approaching people, because I have this ever-existing schema that no one likes me, ever. I care too much.

Karma is real, it really is. I'm just waiting for my fill.

Keepin the herb in the suburbs

2008-08-28T14:03:00.003-05:00

I just got done watching Weeds Ep. 1 from season 1, that show is good! It reminds me of creative and clever writing from Nip/Tuck, and is actually interesting. No wonder it's too good for primetime cable TV, it's only available to watch on Showtime. Boo

THIS MACHINE KILLS FASCISTS!

2008-08-27T01:07:00.002-05:00

And I've come to the conclusion that:

Romance and chivalry are both dead. Six feet under.

No, I do not have dissociative identity disorder

2008-08-23T20:42:00.004-05:00

Hurt.Lonely.Sad.Depressed.Bored.Upset.Euphoric.Left behind.

I made an observation years ago. I even ended up writing a poem about it, but I have since forgot it, and lost the paper it was written down on. I'm always the last one awake when others sleep around me. During those times I would almost always feel the loneliest ever, like I'm being forced to see the end that everyone else had the decency to avoid. The parallel I discovered was that this summer for college, I'm the last one to leave. I have to watch my friends leave one by one and go off to their specific destinations.

First it was Andrew who left for Chicago. I have since talked to him maybe a total of 3 times. I completely understand that he needs new scenery and new friends, but I just can't get over the fact that he's there and I'm here doing nothing whatsoever. Phone calls never get returned, text messages ignored, I suppose I can understand that too, but if it lasts, I don't know what I'll do.

These times suck.

Rhea left today for Chicago as well. She said I can call her anytime I want, and I was balling, of course. Even though we have only been friends for a few months, she still is a great friend to me, and it actually feels like we've been friends for longer.

Tonight was the first Saturday night I didn't leave the house all summer. It made me miss my friends even more, and look forward toward the grim months ahead in Hicksville, WI. Even though I'm rooming with my best friend and she'll always be my best friend, I just know something terrible will happen. Like she'll be my only friend, or no one will like me. Jesus, I sound like a kid going to summer camp for the first time. Pathetic, but it's true. Everyone tells me it's not going to be as bad as I think, but I refuse to believe so. I'm not meant for a small town with a mediocre educational institution. It's not very Andrea-esque at all.

Not at all.

"I wish that you were here with me to pass the dull weekend. I knew it wouldn't come to love, my heroine pretend."-Belle & Sebastian

Current Music: Cabin "I Was Here" EP

For my consideration: Schools I will be applying to

2008-08-21T11:19:00.003-05:00

Well, as we all know, I am morally opposed to getting my degree from UW-Oshkosh. So here's a list of schools I would like to dream on about getting into.

1. Loyola University
2. DePaul University
3. UW-Madison
4. University of Michigan

Wish me luck

Like sand through the hour glass, these are the days of our lives.

2008-08-19T13:15:00.003-05:00

It's all...black and white. And the acting is even cheesier than usual. Lame.

I recently hosted a juice-tasting party in my parlor. Things went swimmingly, and we had some very fine juice, all the way from 1014 B.C.

New laptop + working WiFi= More posts.

2008-08-16T03:10:00.008-05:00

Is it just me or are the Olympics really badass this year? I mean, honestly, so many records have been broken, the competition is intense, and it's in fricken CHINA! China is intriguing, I must say. But I think the only place I would ever visit is Hong Kong, which isn't even really China since it was under British rule for so long. I think the reason everyone's beating records isn't because of evolution, but because steroids have all gone under the radar. Hopefully Michael Phelps will do the Marion Jones thing and admit to his use years after the fact. Let's just hope.

Roids aside, I can't stop watching these superhuman athletes. Anytime I turn on my TV, I immediately check if any Olympaction is happening, and thanks to the overzealous coverage, it almost always is. I forgot to mention, Michael Phelps won by a fucking THUMBNAIL??! What is this? Insane.

I also like the paradoxial sponsors. Athletes eating McDonalds? Yeah, okay. Budweiser? These people don't have time for that shit, they're all detoxing so they can run 200 meters in .000234 seconds and downing shots of wheatgrass for breakfast. But it makes me laugh.

ಪಾಯಿಂಟ್ಲೆಸ್ಸ್

2008-06-28T02:29:00.004-05:00

I know people dream, and I know people have outlandish fantasies, but if our band were to tour with anyone, I would want it to be:

1. Cobra Starship
2. The Ting Tings
3. Muse
4. Cobra Starship
5. Cobra Starship
6. Cobra Starship

If only, if only

2008-06-02T00:48:00.001-05:00

I felt inclined to make another post within such a short amount of time between the preceding one and this entry. I wanted to make a list of things that money can indeed buy:

1. A stress-free environment
2. Knowledge/Wisdom
3. Love
4. STDs
5. Enemies
6. franchises
7. More money(aka investing)
8. A well respected future
9. Friends
10. Furniture worth being envious of
11. A new body
12. Sophistication
13. Culture
14. People
15. Ridiculously advanced cellphones

さいきんはとてもたいへんだったな...

2008-06-01T21:33:00.000-05:00

It's actually here...this bittersweet ending that we've been anticipating and fearing at the same time. In seven days I will walk across that stage and never look back.

Think of it this way: We're at school for 150 days a year for 8 hours everyday. A lot happens in those 8 hours. Relationships develop, found memories are formed, and the need to belong is fufilled. Life as we know it thusfar will never be the same again. No more high school dances (as stupid as they could be) no more dressing up like an insane person for spirit week, no more using your age as a sign of innocence to get out of trouble. We are no longer children under the wing of public funding and most of us will never see each other again.

So, as adolescence collides head-on with going into the "real world," we must adapt, and maintain stable internally. It's really all about how well we can cope individually.

Franklin High School Class of 2008, most of us did it

"Oh, you pretty things"

2008-05-04T23:41:00.000-05:00

This 54 degree day isn't particularly different, I just appreciate it more. I'm on the edge between a breath of fresh air, being today, and tomorrow's monday will be a forceful shove into the last days of high school. These next two weeks may be a challenge, but no fear after Thursday, May 13th, I will be free. I can already feel the breath of summer's whipsers on my neck, but I mustn't get distracted. We all know what happened last year...European History....

And lately, I've been dreaming of this. I've always wanted to go to Maldives. Resorts with bungalows such as these can mimick a utopia where you never have to leave (starting at USD$800 a night). I look forward to a life like this. Someday, maybe.

----

I have not been preoccupied with trivial things like relationships, either. Why even bother, honestly? There's no time for it, and there are more important aspects out there, namely graduating right now. But, I can exert my time and effort on something useful for now, and he can come later.